Hu Tao Is Monetizing My Existence. [15]

The scroll looked quite old, its paper yellowed with time. Some of the ancient ink had already started to blur.

Jiang Bai could see clearly—it was filled with names, densely packed from top to bottom, spanning countless generations.

He had every reason to believe that Hu Tao hadn’t just randomly decided to bring him to the Statue of The Seven on a whim.

Otherwise, why would she have prepared all of this in advance?

Hu Tao, however, paid no mind to his suspicions. She took out three long incense sticks, lit them, and placed them in the incense burner. With hands clasped together, she bowed respectfully and recited:

"As the 77th Master of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, I, Hu Tao, ask the Lord of Geo and our ancestors to bear witness. From this day forward, Jiang Bai shall be a disciple of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. Together, we shall weather storms and share both honor and disgrace."

Seeing her solemn expression, Jiang Bai instinctively straightened his posture.

His eyes fell upon the names recorded on the scroll—each name representing a person, a soul, a legacy. These were all the predecessors of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor.

There was no grand ceremony, no audience to bear witness. Just the two of them, standing before a statue and the names of countless ancestors.

Before, joining Wangsheng Funeral Parlor had seemed like nothing more than going along with the flow. But at this moment, Jiang Bai finally felt the weight of it, truly seeing himself as part of the funeral parlor.

Hu Tao’s crisp voice rang beside him. "Repeat after me."

"Guide the dead to rest, serve the living well. Banish evil spirits, bring peace to the world."

It was the doctrine of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor—their creed.

"Guide the dead to rest, serve the living well. Banish evil spirits, bring peace to the world."

Two voices, one after the other, echoed through the quiet mountain forest—firm and resolute.

Jiang Bai didn’t know what kind of person he had been before.

But since he had chosen to join Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, he was willing to abide by its creed.

With the ceremony complete, Hu Tao took up the brush and carefully added Jiang Bai’s name to the bottom of the scroll.

After everything was done, she let out a long breath, finally relaxing.

Jiang Bai also withdrew from his solemn state, sighing. "I honestly thought I was already part of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor the moment you took me back."

Hu Tao packed everything away, waving a hand nonchalantly. "Technically, yeah. But rituals matter! Otherwise, it’d feel too casual—no sense of belonging or recognition."

"You weren’t worried that I might be some villain with ulterior motives?"

"The things you said yesterday proved you’re not a bad person. And even if you’re not a 'good' person, you at least have principles."

She tapped her temple meaningfully. "Besides, a person who has lost their memories is like a blank page. Whether they turn out good or bad depends on how they choose to write their story."

"And also, I—" Hu Tao puffed out her chest proudly. "—have absolute confidence in my judgment!"

Jiang Bai chuckled—genuinely.

He wasn’t sure if he had any principles. He didn’t even know if he had been good or bad before losing his memories.

But as Hu Tao said, in the end, it was up to him to decide what kind of person he wanted to be.

He tilted his head back, letting the warm sunlight wash over him.

Being trusted… really is a great feeling.

"Alright! Time to head down!"

Hu Tao sprang to her feet, her energy seemingly boundless despite the long morning trek.

Jiang Bai, resigned to his fate, hoisted the basket onto his back and followed her down the mountain.

---

The setting sun painted the sky with golden hues as the two of them returned to Liyue Harbor under the glow of twilight.

It was dinnertime, and the delicious aroma of food drifted from countless homes, stirring up their appetites.

As if on cue, their stomachs both rumbled loudly.

Without a word, they quickened their pace—dinner was the priority.

...

Back at Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, the attendants greeted them with smiles. "Director Hu, where have you been this time?"

"I had an absolutely brilliant idea! After dinner, gather everyone for a meeting—we have some serious planning to do!"

With that cryptic remark, Hu Tao disappeared like the wind, leaving the attendants standing there, bewildered.

What now?

Not another 'Buy One, Get One Free' funeral deal, right?

Sigh… This is going to be another chaotic night.

Despite their worries, the attendant still nodded and went off to notify the others.

---

Following the mouthwatering scent of food, Jiang Bai made a beeline for the dining hall—only to find Hu Tao already stuffing her face.

Without hesitation, he joined in.

Strangely enough, he hadn’t felt all that hungry yesterday despite eating very little.

But now? The moment he smelled the food, he felt starving.

Wangsheng Funeral Parlor wasn’t a large organization, but aside from guest consultants, it still had about twenty or so full-time members.

Mealtimes were the liveliest part of the day. The attendants chatted as they ate, exchanging stories and laughter.

The man in charge of cooking was an elderly gentleman named Uncle Ge. He prepared all three meals every day for the parlor’s members.

His hair had already turned white, but he was still full of energy. He had once been an attendant himself, having watched Hu Tao grow up. Never having married, he had taken on the role of Wangsheng’s cook when age made his other duties too difficult.

To him, Wangsheng Funeral Parlor was home.

Watching the younger members chatting and eating together filled him with a quiet sense of satisfaction—like seeing little saplings grow into strong trees.

When his gaze fell on Jiang Bai, the newest addition, his expression turned warm.

"Little Jiang, since you just joined, I don’t know your tastes yet. Let me know if anything doesn’t suit you, or if you have any dietary restrictions."

"Uncle Ge’s cooking is amazing! I’ve never had food this good!"

Jiang Bai had already met Uncle Ge the day before, so he wasn’t a stranger.

Hearing the old man’s concern, Jiang Bai immediately started shoveling food into his mouth, showering him with exaggerated praise.

His enthusiasm made Uncle Ge chuckle. He patted Jiang Bai’s back lightly. "Eat slowly, eat slowly. If you like the food, that’s all that matters. You’ve had it rough, child. If there’s anything you particularly like, just let me know, and I’ll make it for you."

Jiang Bai clutched his chest dramatically, pretending to wipe away invisible tears. "Uncle Ge, you’re too kind!"

He wasn’t actually that emotional, but if acting a little exaggerated made the old man happy, then why not?

That said, Wangsheng Funeral Parlor was a pretty comfortable place to be.

There were no rigid constraints, no strict schedules like a nine-to-five job.

As for the "Return to the Roots" business expansion plan Hu Tao had mentioned…

Eh. He’d deal with it when the time came.

"Heh heh…" Uncle Ge laughed heartily. "If Director Hu ever gives you trouble, come tell me. I’ll set her straight for you."

"Uncle Ge, what kind of nonsense is that?" Hu Tao interjected. "How could I possibly bully my own subordinates?"

"That’s debatable…"

Laughter filled the dining hall.

...

After eating her fill, Hu Tao patted her round, satisfied stomach and stretched lazily.

Her gaze swept across the room before she suddenly hopped onto a chair, making sure everyone could see her.

"Ahem! Everyone, gather in the main hall after dinner! I have a big plan to announce!"

---

This is a fan translation of 胡桃拿我冲业绩 by 余溯. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!